"Junior" Dem Senator Arlen Specter Uses Proxy Bale To Question Sotomayor

The former Republican 5-term senator from Pennsylvania and once-chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee is now the junior Democratic senator after switching sides recently in a bid to win re-election in 2010. But the old dog still acts like king of the roost, having worked in his office all morning on day one of judge Sonia Sotomayor's confirmation hearing (knowing he wouldn't get to speak until mid-afternoon), and most recently, employing an obscure senate rule, using a proxy to ask the tough questions that a Democrat seeking reelection should probably not utter aloud. Enter one Christian Bale, thespian and, by most accounts, abrasive, egotistical asshole.

"I know Mr. Bale will serve admirably in my stead,"

assured Sen. Specter, adding "though I might not be entirely responsible for anything he says, depending on what that might be."

Day Three of the Senate Judiciary Committee Sotomayor Confirmation Hearings:

Committee Chairman, Senator Patrick Leahy (D-VT) acknowledges the highly unusual use of a proxy yet introduces the megalomaniacal űber-sphincter to the floor. "Thank you, senator. Now, Ms. Sotomayor, I see you were appointed to the federal bench as a U.S. District Court judge in 1991 by President George H.W. Bush, and to the 2nd Circuit U.S. Court of Appeals in 1997 by President Clinton. Is that right?" queried the smarmy Welshman.

"It is, sir, yes," answered the judge.

"Ohhhh welllll goooood for YOOOUU, you fucking ASSHOLE!!!!!" ejaculated the prima donna to a startled but not surprised audience. "That's just FUCKING GREAT, isn't it!!??? You just wander in here with your FUCKING ATTITUDE and your wise Latina FUCKING BULLSHIT remarks, totally oblivious to the work we're trying to do here!!!!!!!!!" shouted a visibly irritated Bale. "How would you like it," continued the once-A-list star, "if I wandered into your courtroom and accidently broke your gavel?!! Huh?!!"

A strafed Sotomayor began to respond, "I don't think this language or tone is very produ..."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!" interjected the sociopathic, self-important fuck. "I'm gonna come down there and KICK YOUR FUCKIN' ASS!!!" screamed the Batman star. After three minutes and forty-seven seconds, police did manage to drag the actor from the committee chambers as he screamed "YOU'RE FUCKIN' AMATEUR, MAN!!!!"

The Reason for the Season

This 4th of July, it occurs to me that most of us who set off whizzers and blossoms, Roman candles, sparklers, pinwheels, bottle-rockets, and M-80s, have little thought of the import and magnitude of the date we collectively celebrate. Unlike Christmas, during which many of us are wrongly accused of "missing the point," i.e. Jesus's alleged birthday, at Independence Day many of us truly are missing the point. It was a very big deal the day our colonial ancestors drew a line in the sand and publicly declared our independence from the British Crown. Technically, that day was July 2, 1776, but it took a couple of days back then to make such a declaration public. John Adams suggested that "July 2nd will forever be a day of celebration" for Americans in years to come. But we didn't have Tweeter or the internets then. Just print media.
The significance is more than shrugging off the yoke of imperialism. The big deal is our Founders taking that opportunity to create, from scratch, an entirely new and novel form of government. From the beginning they felt that it was not only possible, but necessary, that a just government be composed of the people, by the people, for the people. This is a powerful and elegant idea. One that would shape the future. It's an idea that we are still trying to reconcile with current events.
We are a nation of laws. Not might. Not Majority rule. Laws. That is what allows us to claim any superiority over other nations still stuck in totalitarian or other subversive forms of government. Nothing else.
As for Christmas, is Jesus the reason for the season? I really don't think so. If he lived at all, he probably was born in July or August, not December. This is from extrapolating data from the New Testament. There is much further evidence showing that the Roman Church co-opted many of the popular pagan holidays to make the mandatory transition to Christianity more palatable. Christmas is the main one. Our continued use of the Christmas tree is persistent evidence of this.

Be well.