McCain Is Clear And Consistent

"The fundamentals of our economy are strong."
"The fundamentals of our economy are at risk!"
"We need to create a commission to analyze the economic meltdown."
"We know what went wrong! We don't need no stinking commission!"
"I don't know much about economics."
"I never said I don't know much about economics."
"I am fundamentally a de-regulator."
"We need more regulations and oversight on banking institutions."
"I'm against the AIG bailout."
"We must bail out AIG."

ALL this in the last ten days. From the same guy.

Space, The Final Franchise

Oh my god, I can not wait! I love the Star Trek universe. Gene Roddenberry and his Star Trek were way, way ahead of their time. It premiered in 1965, the year Black Americans gained the right to vote, nationally. At the height of the Cold War. Yeah, James Tiberius Kirk was a little too quick to fight, and some of the moral lessons of the show seem like "just so" naive plays by today's standards. But still... there was a Black woman officer, a Russian helmsman, an Asian navigator, and a fucking pointy-eared Pan-devil alien chief science officer on the bridge. In 1965. And their mission (their 5-year mission) was to explore strange, new worlds. To seek out new life and new civilizations, and to go boldly where no one had gone before (cleaned up the sexism and the split infinitive in one fell swoop).
I love Trek for the same reason (I think) so many others do: It's inspiring and hopeful. It suggests the very best of humanity and even points the way. That goes for the original series and perhaps even more so in the Next Generation. Not that I want to fight over that. It's all encouraging and inspiring. That goes for Voyager and Deep Space Nine, and Enterprise. It's an enduring franchise. It's a universe that speaks to so many of us. But Hollywood is fickle, and it's hard to keep mining the same vein and expect to hit gold.
That's where JJ Abrams comes in. This guy is the hot new thing. Creator of "Alias." Creator of "Lost." He singlehandedly saved the Mission: Impossible series, in my opinion. Here is a man who can give us a fresh, exciting look at familiar friends. If you don't like LOST you haven't seen it. If you've seen it and still don't like it you're an idiot. Why am I talking to you? Go see Trek when it comes out, fool.

Daily Show Clip O' The Month

LIARS!

All right, motherfuckers, the gloves are off! Time to call a spade a spade. These people are liars. They habitually tell lies. They have no compunctions about looking you right in the eye and telling you something that they not only know to be false, but know there's a good possibility you know it's false, too. And they say it anyway! The fucking balls on these people.

They say things like, "I said 'Thanks, but no thanks,' to that 'Bridge to Nowhere," and "I sold the governor's jet on eBay," and "I shook up Alaska and have opposed earmarks," for Palin's part. And McCain will look you right in the eye and say, "I knew all along that Iraq was going to be a long and difficult fight," and "I gave the Viet Cong the names of the Pittsburg Steelers defensive line when they interrogated me for the names of commanding officers," and "I never said I didn't know much about the economy."

The list is painfully long. I'm sure I left out some much better examples, but these were the three (each) that I pulled from the top of my head. And consider this- it is a fact that John McCain called his wife a "trollop" and a "cunt" in front of reporters and aides. That he would call his wife such things at all speaks to his character. The fact that he called her these things in public speaks to his judgment. It speaks volumes. I mean, doesn't it? C'mon, even you hardcore wackjob conservative fundies have to admit that such an outburst belies his wisened war-hero image, right? If not, what would? Does he have to beat his wife on live television and urinate on the American flag before there's even a murmur among Republicans that he may not be fit to lead our nation?

What about Sarah Palin not knowing what the Bush Doctrine is? I almost felt bad for her. Sure, lots of Americans probably don't know what the Bush Doctrine is. And they don't necessarily need to nor should they be expected to. Unless they're running for Vice motherfucking President of the United motherfucking States, claiming that they're more experienced than some stupid ass "community organizer"! These are insincere people who just want to get into office at any cost. They don't care about you. They care about their corporate sponsors, and that's it. Can it be any more obvious? "You can actually see Russia from Alaska," and did you know that "Barack Obama wants to teach sex education to kindergarteners"?

That Appetizer You Like...

It's pronounced broo-sketta.

You're welcome.

POW, Right In The Kisser

Gay Republicans, In And Out Of The Closet, Endorse McCain

In a monumentally ineffectual move against their own interests, oxymoronic gay Republican group "The Log Cabin Republicans" officially endorsed John McCain, the GOP nominee.
"Sen. McCain is no George Bush when it comes to gay issues. We are much more optimistic and enthusiastic about Sen. McCain," Patrick Sammon, the group's president, told Reuters. The endorsement may boost McCain's reputation as a maverick who reaches across partisan lines, but it may not go down well (no pun intended) with his party's conservative Christian base.

"God hates fags! You people who choose to engage in sodomy and sin shall burn in hell forever!" suggested Governor Palin. "I mean," she added "that's what it says in the Bible." Yes, it does say that somewhere. Some would argue, and have, that that alone is reason to take a more critical look at traditional Christian attitudes. Do we, most of us, really want to be ruled by a bunch of superstitious fucking homophobes? I don't think so. At least, I fucking hope not. In other news, the NAACP has endorsed their pick for the new Grand Dragon of the Ku Klux Klan, and the United Union Workers of America have voted unanimously to stop pestering Home Depot, WalMart, General Motors, and all supermarket chains. "You guys can probably take better care of workers' interests than we can, let's face it," admitted a sheepish Jim Hoffa, Jr., president of the United Teamsters Union.